Worry, worry, worry constantly fills my thoughts every single day.
How will I finish my paper in time? What’s going to happen tomorrow? Do people even like me?
Hi, my name is Jessie, I am a college sophomore, and I have anxiety issues. I have a constant day-to-day battle with, well, everything. Almost every thought that enters my mind, it’s something I’m worrying about. My hands are always sweaty because I am always nervous about something. I’m not shy, but I have trouble talking to and being comfortable with other people. The thing with anxiety, though, is that it’s almost invisible to those who don’t deal with it. Or if explained to them, it’s almost scoffed at. The line, “oh, don’t worry so much!” is something I hear all the time from those who don’t take time to understand it.
Panic attacks hit me hard during my junior year of high school. I had over 20 in one month. I despised the feelings it made me feel. I would be sitting in class one moment, and the next I would be having a meltdown inside. I did not know what caused it. It would just happen and all I knew is that I wanted out of that classroom as soon as possible. The thought of the feeling of going through a panic attack made me sick. Why did I of all people have such a crazy, nearly unexplainable problem…
Here’s the thing. I have come to realize that I was blessed with this “issue” because I know somewhere out there in my future I’m going to meet someone who has the same feelings that I felt/sometimes feel today. And I’m going to get to help them! I’m going to be that person that understands how they feel, just like my mom is for me. I truly believe that God gives us our hard times to help those in need in the future. And I absolutely LOVE that!
I am a Fighter because God gave me this life to not complain about it, or to think that I am alone, but to help others in their own journeys!