My Mom’s Fight by Jamie Grace

mona

She fights with her hair & make up done, her favorite pumps and dress and with a constant assurance that her Faith is the drive for her fight. You would never know my mom was facing a battle unless you were to ask and the height it all began in January.

Over the last 5 years my mom has faced various health challenges and last year was diagnosed with a rare condition called pudendal neuralgia. As a result of her condition she began struggling with every day tasks some as simple as walking or sitting up. As a manager in the music industry and a pastor alongside my dad she began working primarily from home and making adjustments as to not overwork herself however if you’ve ever met my mom (or me, the jr version) then you know that’s a challenge. Over the years she has been a mom (“mama mona”) to the motherless, a friend to the friendless, a teacher to the teacherless (she started a private school and a homeschool co op when i was in grade school) and just about everything else she could become to serve others. It’s not my mom’s norm to have to fight for her own life. She’s used to fighting for everyone else’s.

As with any medical condition our family, and many of our friends, spent forever on the good ole Google trying to find a cure for mom’s condition. It has many complications and while the risk for her life is not close to being the highest, the quality of life is one of the most common adjustments. Additionally, barely any doctors even know about pudendal neuralgia and all of the ones we could find had waiting lists longer than anything. Eventually we found a doctor in Boston willing to take mom’s case and try an experimental surgery. It took months to get the appointment and in January my dad took off work, my grandma (his mom from Texas who, to my heart’s break, isn’t a Cowboys fan but that’s another post) flew to Boston and the three of them embarked on a journey with mom.

My sister Morgan and I flew in the day after the surgery and flew out that next morning, we (along with my tour manager/brother in law) were on a tour called The Roadshow and could only be we with her for a few hours. However, I could see the hope in her eyes. I could see the peace in my dad’s. I could see the compassion in my grandmother’s. I could see the kindness in the eyes of the nurses and the friends (Duncans, we love you) who had picked us girls up from an airport an hour away to make sure we got to the hospital to see our mom. There were so many positive emotions in that room. It was hard to think she had just been through a 5 hour nerve-related surgery. Or maybe it was the obvious.

Considering mom’s condition, her physical recovery post surgery could be up to 5 years.

Typically when I say that to friends who ask “how’s your mom?” I see them tense up and slowly nod. Acting as though they were completely expecting that answer. They immediately resort to, “but your mom’s a fighter…” or “I’ll be praying for her” which I love, mom loves, and we appreciate more than anything. But the reality is, being a fighter doesn’t always mean that the battle is coming to an end. Sometimes it means you’re halfway through, sometimes it means it’s only begun and in many cases it means that you don’t know where you are but you know it’s still worth the fight.

Over the last few months we have had the most extreme of many situations. I have seen my mom cry more than any daughter should have to. I have seen my dad hold her when many husbands would’ve walked away. I have seen my mom laugh at the smallest moments and learn how to sit at home watching cable television (She literally hates sitting at home and does not like watching TV too much. She’s usually out starting after school programs, visiting and encouraging inmates and decorating houses for low income families – not kidding). I have seen my mom’s management company grow with more staff members and interns who are incredible at working with her to get the job done.

Through the pain, tears, fear, frustration, confusion… I’ve witnessed joy, true love, compassion, peace, loyalty, Faith… seeing my mom go to church for the first time in months. Watching her learn how to walk again, using her walker proudly. Seeing her learn to sit up again. Seeing her realize she has to stand more than sit so watching my dad request bar stool tables at restaurants because he refuses to sit without her. Seeing my brother in law and sister move back home for the last year and a half to be near her. Seeing our church members bring over dinner when they know the kids are out of town. Seeing the NOW guys and my band/crew love my mom when her own kids aren’t home. Just two nights ago, seeing some of her closest friends and family members gather at my house for her birthday party. Not only celebrating her 48th, but celebrating her life as a whole.

Yes, there is pain.

Yes, there will be healing.

Yes, there will be freedom.

But yes… there will be pain.

I don’t know how long this specific journey will last for our family, but I know that we serve a King who will be with us every step of the way. I know that He has put my mom’s coworkers, friends, church family and family in her life for a reason and I’m grateful that they are there to encourage her daily.

Mother’s Day used to mean asking my dad for $10 to buy my mom a card and a gift. Obviously as I’ve gotten older things have changed but even now it’s not a matter of picking out something cute for her to rep next time she goes out (even thought I totally got her new cowboy boots…). I guess it’s partially because I’m an adult, but Mother’s Day now? It’s a completely different story. It’s about sitting there with my mom, through pain or joy, and taking in all of who she is.

mona2

Her wisdom, her humor, her laugh, her joy, her jokes, (if you can’t tell the lady is straight up HILARIOUS) her advice (about guys… let me tell you… it’s on point), her strength, her fight… because at the end of the day women don’t become mothers for themselves. Motherhood – the most selfless and underpaid position ever – is a job centered around molding someone else into who they’re gonna be. I  pray that I’ve taken enough notes and continue to keep my pen ready. She has much more to teach, I have much more to learn, and I couldn’t be more appreciative that my trainer is the most well equipped fighter I know.

She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.” Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate. -Proverbs 31:25-31

For the rest of the week I’ve decided to feature the stories of moms who are also fighters. Click here to share your mom’s story.

Mucho amor,
Jamie Grace

Likes(255)Dislikes(11)

37 thoughts on “My Mom’s Fight by Jamie Grace

  1. May God continue to give your mom courage, endurance, patience and strength. He has already blessed her with loving, supportive family and friends. May we all read stories like your mom's and be inspired to help others in our own churches and communitues.

    Likes(14)Dislikes(4)
  2. This is the best thing I have read in a while. Praying for all of you!!! Jamie you are so inspiring and thank you for sharing this beautiful story!!

    Likes(11)Dislikes(1)
    • Jamie, that was really beautiful. You can feel the love through your statements, what a wonderful daughter you are, you keep taking those notes your momma sounds like a wonderful woman, God is right there with her. Praying for you and your family. God's got this. Bless you lady and keep up the great work your already doing.

      Likes(2)Dislikes(0)
  3. Your family is intelligent, talented, and beautiful. God blessed you all. Your illness (I listened to your ransom note) and now your mom's is a challenge and I for one will be praying for your whole family. And in the song of another artist, "Praise you in this storm", remember that and I'll bet He will walk you right thru this storm.

    In His Love, J.W.

    Likes(9)Dislikes(0)
  4. Jamie I will be praying for your mama!! I hope that this message may also help someone else. JESUS IS THE MIGHTY HEALER! AMEN!!

    Likes(6)Dislikes(0)
  5. wow Jamie just by reading this it tells that your mom is a warrior and God is really moving May she fight her battle through God who strengthens her May the Lord be with Your Family for he said He will never leave you nor forsake you ... Stay strong Much Love all the way from Namibia....

    Likes(5)Dislikes(0)
  6. I am amazed at YOUR insight at such a young age for your mother. How honored and proud she must be to call you her daughter. And how perfectly awesome that you treasure, respect and honor her as your mother. It sounds like she is pretty amazing, but it also tells me you are pretty amazing. She has raised a very smart young lady.

    Likes(6)Dislikes(0)
  7. Inspirational, I'm a fibromyalgia survivor, a Christian, and a mum and fight through every day, Jamies story about her mum helped me feel better about my position and all I try to do dispite my circumstances, ptl for healing & grace.

    Likes(2)Dislikes(1)
  8. Wow, thanks for sharing this. Beautiful and inspirational. Sometimes we need to hear other peoples stories to help put our own lives in perspective. We all deal with things big and small, we will get through! In Him we can do ALL things. Blessings to your family ❤️

    Likes(2)Dislikes(0)
  9. You're an amazing writer, as well as songwriter! You are a strong young women of Christ, just like you're Mom! May God be with you both! 🙂

    Likes(2)Dislikes(0)
  10. i pray that your mom gets well cause from what i see she has much more to live for she can not die at such a young age it just can not happen i pray that her illnes will be cleared in the name of the lord jesus the father god that died for our sins and washed away sins live and continue to improve your mother life to keep improving other people lives in jesus mighty name.Amen your mother has given me advice i might be 13 but boy has she helped me

    Likes(2)Dislikes(0)
  11. You and your beautiful family, especially your mom, have left one incredible impact on my life. Over this weekend, I learned that not only do you have to live each day as if it's your last, but you must also live like today will be your last. And with this knowledge, your mom showed me that it's not about crying in the rain, but hilariously dancing through it. Because after rainstorms, come sunshine; Mrs. Mona is that sunshine. Thank you for blogging this, I truly appreciate you both.

    Likes(1)Dislikes(0)
  12. A beautiful story written by a loving daughter for Mothers Day...prayers for Jamie ' s family. ....I know your voice has brought joy to my 6 year old son whenever one of your songs comes on the radio....may God send comfort to your mom and your family:)

    Likes(0)Dislikes(0)
  13. What a beautiful tribute to an all-star mother and a role model for moms everywhere. Dear Mrs. Mona, It is SO hard to be still when you are used to being anything BUT. Very frustrating. So since our Father will not allow you to be harmed in any way that would interfere with His purpose for you, I will be praying that for this brief season, you will be able to be still and let Him minister to YOU, as you have served HIM tirelessly for so many years. I pray that He will surround you with people who can be to you what you have always been to others, so that you get a tiny glimpse of the impact you've had and the joy you have given.

    Likes(1)Dislikes(0)
  14. Jamie,
    Your writings of what your family is going through resonates within my heart. I really appreciate how open you are to share a part of your story with us, even though it is painful. It strikes such a deep chord within me because this past January marked 7 years since my mom passed away from cancer. I was only 22 and had just moved home the prior year when she had been diagnosed. I know that pain of watching your mom fight and seeing things you never should have to see. Crying and praying and clinging to hope. We never gave up, and now she finally is healed and whole with Jesus. It is not the answer I wanted, but God is good through everything. He is faithful even when I am not. Keep on praying and trusting in God's plan, girl! It is not always easy, but we know that "God causes all things to work together for the good of those who love him. To those who are called according to his will and purpose." Romans 8:28

    Likes(2)Dislikes(0)
  15. Jamie,
    I know the fight and know this is a journey...not an open and closed book like people want and expect...It's HIS time, not ours. I would like to help get a note from Joni to your mom (since I know she's a fan, alongside you) of encouragement. Please let me know where to get it to...And in the meantime, I encourage you and your family that this is HIS daughter in his hands- and although the fight is long, unfair and unknowing...he's GOT YOU ALL. He always has <3

    Likes(1)Dislikes(0)
  16. Mother's Day has come to an end for anotther year. So, I was just sitting here reading all the posts on facebook. Also, feeling sorry for myself that I don't have my mom anymore. I am so happy for her that she's finally done fighting cancer and has joined my daddy in heaven...what a picture that is for me. He lost his fight with cancer when I was just six. Oh, I'm so happy for all my loved ones that I know are enjoying sitting at Jesus' feet. But I do feel sorry for myself , on occasion that they aren't here with me...I miss them so much! Thank you for your story, Jamie. I have loved you from so far away for a long time. But your story had me sobbing! I will pray for God's will for your mother. She sounds like an amazing lady! My two grown daughters, one son-in-law, husband and four nearly grown grands. showed me a wonderful day. I am so blessed! The best thing my mom did for her five children was introducing each of us to our Savior! God bless you & yours, Sweetie!

    Likes(2)Dislikes(0)
  17. Hello,
    I read your story and could relate to your Mom. I am 35 years old, Married, have 6 children (one of which has cerebral Palsy), and diagnosed with Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome 4 years ago, after they found 2 leaky heart valves. Now I had never heard of this disorder before and now I seem to be hearing of more people being diagnosed with it. I had been sick with the H1N1 virus 2 month's before and it lasted over a month, when I thought it was over, all the sudden I could not get from one room to the next. My heart felt like it was going to race out of my chest and I couldn't breathe. My Husband took me to my doctor and we didn't fund out I had 2 leaky heart valves until 5 months later, they didn't check my heart sooner because of my age. Long story short we decided I needed a cardiologist and asked for a referral to my Grandmas Cardiologist. That's where I was diagnosed and devastated because I had something that no one could possibly understand. It's an autonomic disfunction, everything that is automatic in our body is because of our autonomic system. Swallowing, sitting up, standing, digestion, body temperature ect. Every time I stand up (w/out my meds) my blood pressure drops 31 points and my heart races. I have seen my blood pressure read 68 over 45 before when standing up. They think I was born with it and that the virus brought it out full force. I could not do the things for my Husband and Children that came so naturally before, anymore. I have had to learn a new way of life, I have learned to lean on Christ, literally. I have learned to embrace it instead of resist it because it helps me to rest in the Lord and to seek out what He has for me instead of what I have for me. I would love to meet your Mom and let her know, she is not alone. All my love to you and your family.

    Likes(3)Dislikes(0)
  18. Your music means so much to my 9 year old daughter, Marissa (I enjoy it, too). Your mother and family will be in our prayers. The Lord is with you and this illness has already been sifted through His hands before it touched your mother. He will hold her in His mighty hands.

    Likes(1)Dislikes(0)
  19. Jamie,

    I love the photo at the top of you and your family. I am sorry that you are all having to go through this struggle. We both know, however, that it's through the struggles that God makes us stronger. On those days when it seems like you can't even hold up your head, remember that your Heavenly Father is holding it up for you. No matter the trial, test or struggle, you are never without comfort. Praying for God to fill you all with His abundant peace as your Mother heals and your family grows closer and stronger!

    Likes(1)Dislikes(0)
  20. Dear Jamie,

    I've grown to care so much for you, and the people that surround your life. I'll be honest and say I'd love the chance to get to know you all someday. I know any kind of medical news of this nature involving confusion and worry is quite the heavy burden, but I do know your entire family are FIGHTERS, and our God is an awesome God who can do ANYTHING...I know your mother is in good hands, and can continue to stay strong with each passing moment. I met you and your sister, Morgan, at your DO LIFE BIG Tour in March (Cincinnati), and I just loved the way the Lord was shininhg through you both and I could tell just how amazing you two are. Mama Mona defifnitely raised two wonderful women of Christ, and I can just imagine how proud you continue to make her. I'm sending prayers up, and keeping the faith that this battle will soon come to an end, with your mother VICTORIOUS! Much love, & God bless....<3

    Likes(0)Dislikes(0)
  21. Hi Jamie,
    I'm glad you and your family still Hold on despite these challenges.I know God is aware of your situation and HE is busy making a way through for your family (though you might not see it).I'm a fan from Ghana and your family inspires me a lot(from the first day I knew you,I listened to your song,'Holding On' from a friend's PC,watched your Ransom note and read about you). I know the good works God is using you and your family to do changing lives,inspiring and teaching among others...I would love to meet you in person someday,I'll pray for your family.continue praising God in the storm because in good times,and in bad times,HE IS STILL GOD! Love y'all ,God bless y'all

    Likes(1)Dislikes(0)
  22. "My portion you will ever be" is what Don Moen sang and i hope you can listen to it Jamie, it will strengthen you and your family...GOD is in control.

    Likes(1)Dislikes(0)
  23. life is so uncertain, but as christians we have this daily assurance that God's strength will carry us through the tough moment we face in life. May God assurance and healing be your mum's portion

    Likes(1)Dislikes(0)
  24. Hi Jamie,
    Just read your post, to Taylor Swift and learned of your moms battle. I am praying for her. I have had serious back pain for 6 years and have a younger brother now fighting cancer. Only our faith gets us thru and you are a blessing and an inspiration. God bless you and your family, thank you for your uplifting words and outstanding music. Saw your sisters video you posted too! Doubly blessed

    Likes(2)Dislikes(0)
  25. Mrs. Harper and family! I am praying each and everyday for God's perfect healing. My husband and daughters met you about 2 or 3 years ago at Sam's Warehouse in Stone Mountain. You gravitated to us and started a conversation. I pray that one day we can reconnect again. God Bless you and have a peaceful night.

    Likes(0)Dislikes(0)
  26. It's hard to see our loved ones suffering. My family gas seen its share of heartaches, like most, none of us are immune.
    Something that really helped patients with neuralgias, brain disorders and yes, even cancer, is cannabis oil. Please look into it as an option. It's becoming legal in more states and soon, countrywide. It's different than the stereotypical marijuana, and it can help so many! There are drug trials even if it hasn't passed legislation in your state.
    Praying you all strength and peace through the journey.

    Likes(0)Dislikes(1)
  27. Oh my, I did not mean to dislike your post. Thank you for sharing and thank you for your faith. My kids ask to listen to your CD every day while we're in the car. I love that they are repeating your lyrics over and over. I am sorry about what your mom is going through. It's got to be difficult for all of you. I will pray for her and y'all;)

    Likes(0)Dislikes(0)
  28. Pudendal Neuralgia is a debilitating disease. You are correct when you say may doctors are unaware of the condition. I've now suffered with this condition for 19 years. I have seen more doctors than most folks see in a lifetime. I've had surgery in France (10 years ago it was difficult to find any doctors that knew of the condition in the U.S.), procedures in San Francisco (I live in NC), and have tried many medications (most of which don't work or leave me unable to function). Those of us with the condition look for answers in all directions. If you aren't familiar with the website, www.pudendalhope.org has a wealth of information. It may take awhile, but the answer to this condition will be found for all of us. Be strong.

    Likes(0)Dislikes(0)
  29. Thank you for sharing this. It's great to know that you can have faith in God through the good and the bad. This journey may seem a little tough at times, but just remember that God has a great testimony for you, your mom, and the rest of your family! Stay positive and trusting in God!!
    -A Jamie Grace fan

    Likes(0)Dislikes(0)
  30. Thank you Jamie for such a beautiful tribute. It brought tears to my eye. I see God is using you and your family to show His glory. Just as God has carried you and your family through your illness, He will carry your mom. If God is for us, who can be against us! We are more than conquerors through Christ! I just saw you in Fayetteville NC and took a photo (mama drove!!) ...first time and your testimony blessed me and my daughters. Continue to press on and fight. The prayers of the saints are with you and your family.

    Likes(0)Dislikes(0)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *